For Old Time's Sake

Name: Beini, hopefully, which might cause some confusion with colleges who see my SAT scores under "Bonnie"
Location: My head. Everything's in my head.
Mood: Peaceful, somewhat accomplished.
Favorite College: Yale. I love the architecture and the people seem super nice.
We're all juniors/seniors now, right? How's it like being at the top of the food chain?: My schedules are great because I don't have to be at school until 7:45 on normal days and 9:00 on Fridays. Being a senior also affects how I look at younger kids...basically, in my head, if I don't recognize them, I immediately label them as "one of those darn freshmen." Judgmental? Nahhhhh. It's a privilege I've earned.
So...for the first time in a long time...How Are The Kids?: The youngest is missing her best friend, and looking over blog posts and notes from a long time ago, wishing they were together. The middle worries about learning biology, and wondering if she will be able to please her internship professor. The oldest is, of course, stressing about college, and wondering if her application will be impressive enough compared to her classmates. Stay strong, girls.

no one checks this anymore

but this is relevant to a large population on this dead blog
bonnie
michaelq
lucinda
larry
preston
anita
qualified for FPS internationals. whether we'll go or not...remains to be seen.

filler

happy 2011 guys
FPS soon
state debate tomorrow...so goodnight.

The Things They Carried

A true war story is never moral. It does not instruct, nor encourage virtue, nor suggest models of proper human behavior, nor restrain men from doing the things men have always done. If a story seems moral, do not believe it. If at the end of a war story you feel uplifted or if you feel that some small bit of rectitude has been salvaged from the larger waste, then you have been made the victim of a very old and terrible lie. There is no rectitude whatsoever. There is no virtue. You can tell a true war story by its absolute and uncompromising allegiance to obscenity and evil.

Tim O'Brien

how profound and disheartening. The cynic in me loves it.

wut

Do you seek Amy?

Am I bandwagoning by coming back to Blogger like the few others are? Whatever. The only other person here who I've talked to recently is Anita. So there's that.
But yeah, I wish there was an Amy (what's the boy version of that? Am..... Amir?wtf) in my life. But at the same time it's good to know that nobody's attached to me. Maybe I'm just a really stupid person, but when people are "together" in my mind, no matter what, they're always going to be attached to each other. If I think about someone, it's got to be about "him & her" not just "her" or "him." Well, it's not as bad with really close friends. But still. That childish instinct is still in me.
But maybe if I did find my own "Amy" my mindset would change. Maybe it wouldn't.
Maybe I can just marry Chuck Bartowski and move on with my life kdone

So uh, the kids discovered Glee.

Do you seek Amy?

Nope.

My life is turning into a living high school drama. Not a day goes by without one of the kids singing a recent Glee song in the shower. I must say, I'm glad they're bright children, because they'll never become singers.

A lot of my friends' children are reaching the age at which college is constantly on the forefront of their thoughts. What colleges are you and your kids looking at? :)

"All at Once"--and you begin to wonder...

If you seek Amy?
Maybe a lil bit... lookin' for her, right? xD
But actually not that important.

A friend linked this on facebook; I guess it is good for something
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjIjKT1QfQE&feature=channel
I'm so drawn to her... she is the [only one] that can make my heart beat fast, the [only] one that commands my attention, the [only] one I can laugh, cry, and give my all to.

But I get the feeling my all isn't enough.
Whether it's not enough time spent with her, not bothering her when she's surrounded by all her other guy friends... I guess I do get a lil bit jealous, even though technically we're not together.
But girl, you call out other guys, you talk to me about which guys you think are cute, you punch and kick, you regularly insult my intelligence and much else besides...
Hey! That's our dynamic. That's how it works... and we get along lovely.

But...I still wonder.
I'm not enough. I don't 'sweep you off your feet'
You still think about other guys
I have those quiet, awkward moments where I don't know what to say.
You told me if I can satisfy, you'd move on. Just like I did to you.
We can't relate in a group setting...? All our relationship building happens one on one?
Sometimes it does feel one sided.

Moral of the story: choose that special someone knowing full well what their faults are, whether you're willing to bear those as well.

I chose... well? I'd like to think.
There are days I wonder, and days I definitely do not.
Either be consumed or be independent... I haven't a damn clue
She acts independent. I. . . ?

There are certain people you just keep coming back to
She is right in front of you
You begin to wonder could you find a better one
Compared to her now she's in question

And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there

Looking for the right one you line up the world to find
Where no questions cross your mind
But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt
Much longer for you to sort it out

And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it maybe you need it,
Maybe it's all you're running from,
Perfection will not come

And all at once the crowd begins to sing
Sometimes
We'd never know what's wrong without the pain
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same

Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there
Maybe you want it maybe you need it
Maybe it's all you're running from
Perfection will not come

Maybe you want her maybe you need her
Maybe you had her maybe you lost her to another
To another

...i may be madly in love

We're so olddddddd

Do you seek Amy?

dude I almost forgot about this. ALMOST.
...
We're all sorta out of touch with each other now. Sort of. I still talk to ... huh.
Pei, Bonnie, Larry sometimes, Amanders Venecia Preston
Yup that's all.
Also I don't know how my name got changed to 'Anita.' ._.

Anyway. This is interesting.
Junior Year. After this we're going to college.
Then for real nobody will check this blog.
WE'LL ALL FALL INTO A PIT OF NOTHINGNESS AND FORGET EACH OTHER
But actually there hasn't been any real decent PRISM reunion. Hard to organize those things. akjsdkj;asdf.

Made pie today. And bagels. Didn't do any homework. Should.
...
Okay. That's about it. I only came here because Pei was talking about how she visited Blogger recently.

'so, how are the kids'...
My kids are doing fine. I'm a Link Crew Leader...
I have 10 kids and they are actually the coolest kids ever. JUST SAYING.
I'm hungry.

Junior Year, wow.

Anyone still reading this?

HARRO

Yes, I think the asian accent is the best invention ever. And the Indian accent is pretty intense too.

You vant to eat?

Vivek and I said that at the same time in Health class yesterday. It was an intense moment.
Anyways, now to make up for approximately 50, give or take 10, missed soundoffs.

Fake Name: Silver Cat. Except that's kinda getting old...I think I'll come up with something else later.

Age: 15! Now I can practice driving 3 mph in a parking lot. How exciting~

Height: Taller than Lar- jk, there's too many of those jokes already. I'm 5'6", gaining on you tall people >=]

Highlights of the summer:
Alaska cruise. The Second City comedy troupe is amazing xDD
SEP--Summer Enrichment Program down at University of Oregon. NERD CAMP YAY 8B
Haha I love cheerleaders. A few of them saw a ton of us nerds eating together in the dining hall, and they were like "What are you guys doing here?"
"We're at nerd camp! =DDD"
The cheerleaders go back to their table, like "Omg! There's NERDS here??"

And now that's school starting...
How's IB for you guys? Actually, scratch that. We should talk about non-depressing subjects.
:D